Dante Never Had To Deal With Them...

I hate Ticketmaster.

They are evil bastards.

If Dante had ever tried to get tickets online or call for tickets from Ticketmaster, he most certainly would have reserved a special circle of hell for these evil, evil people.

And if there were ever a way to find out who it was at Ticketmaster who was incredibly slow and unhelpful and who then hung-up on me when I started to get upset, I would find her, follow her, and kick her in the shins really hard. Yeah, I'm a bitter, petty, vengeful bitch that way.

Next time I guess I'll have to go camp out for tickets instead.

Atta Girl!

Earlier tonight I watched an episode of The Anna Nicole Show. While Anna Nicole Smith's behavior on the show often strikes me as absurd and annoying, tonight I had to give her my respect.

The episode was a rerun - it's the one where she's set up on a date through some millionaire's dating service. She goes out on a date with a guy who reminded me of Woody Allen. Claude (the faux-Woody Allen) arrives at her house with roses and special doggie treats for Sugar Pie - and I couldn't help but notice how Anna Nicole keeps him standing on the porch rather than inviting him inside. He takes her to a Japanese restaurant for Wagu Beef (usually more than $100 per pound); she asks for A-1 Sauce. Then, on the way to a cowboy bar to ride the mechanical bull, Anna Nicole whines about wanting some giant pickles - so Claude stops at a deli and then we get to see Anna Nicole chomping & sucking on said pickles in the back of the limo. At the cowboy bar, she immediately orders a giant plate of ribs and mashed potatoes. Then comes the bull riding - Claude does fairly well, but a now-obviously-drunk Anna Nicole flies off the bull twice, and while she's on the bull she looks none too graceful. Then she proceeds to nearly pass out in the faux-Woody Allen's lap on the way home.

So why give her my respect? Well, you see, Anna Nicole did something that many, many women can't do on dates - she was herself, with no apologies and no excuses. Heck, I'm sure men have problems being themselves on dates also.

Anna Nicole:

• spoke up for what she wanted


• ate in front of her date (yes, I do know several people who won't eat much on a date -- they either eat beforehand or afterward)


• wasn't shy about letting him know she was still hungry


• had fun on the mechanical bull with no thought as to how silly she might look

Yes, she's silly and often sounds as though she's on some major drugs. But she's herself and I think that's admirable. She didn't send her "representative" (as Chris Rock jokes) to the date, trying to portray herself only in the best way possible. She went, she ate, she had fun, and she was beautiful. Atta Girl, Anna Nicole!