Glad To Be Home At Last

[disbelief11]

So I'm back home after being at my in-law's house in California for the last ten days. Now I love my in-laws but this was most definitely not a pleasure trip. Nope – I was helping out after my mother-in-law had knee surgery.

My mother-in-law, in true “momishness,” takes care of my 20-month-old niece, the assorted grandparents who are unable to care for themselves, my father-in-law and the rest of the family. The sheer bulk of work she puts in is simply amazing.

Thankfully, I wasn't trying to do everything MIL does. Just trying to keep up with my niece, take our great-aunt to the doctor's office a few times, and keep on top of the basic housecleaning chores was enough to have me falling into bed exhausted each night.

Apart from being tiring, the last ten days taught me several lessons about myself. Here they are, in no particular order:

1. I have no desire to be a full-time mom. It is a hard job. And if anyone reading this thinks otherwise, you should try it for a while. My hat is tipped to all the full-time moms out there. Heck, to all the moms out there.



2. After taking care of my niece, my biological clock has suffered yet another setback. Seriously, right now I cannot fathom being a parent. While Mr. Dis and I thought we were ready a few years ago, we have since changed our minds. Don't get me wrong - we love kids. We are just enjoying our childfree lifestyle right now. As Mr. Dis says, “When we want to go out for the night, we put the dog in his crate and go. You can't do that with a kid.”



3. It is a perverse trick of nature that when my niece doesn't get enough sleep for whatever reason, she has three times as much energy as normal.



4. It is possible to both love your in-laws and want to slap them at the same time.



5. Blue's Clues is a pretty good show. Unfortunately, when one of the Blue's Clues songs is stuck in your head one day and a different BC song is stuck in your head the next day, it gets to be a bit much.



6. My brain has been irrevocably HoYay-ified and pornolized at this point. I was able to see HoYay in innocent shows for young children. Not that it was there – my porny brain simply took the shows and jumped to the next level with them. Thankfully, no one was there to see my blushes when I realized what I had just done.



7. Another thing I learned was that I dislike people who don't stop to think of the needs of others in the group. Hell, I am totally selfish when it's just me, but when there's a group I try to identify what other people need to feel comfortable/cherished/included, etc., and to do something about it if I can. And it royally pisses me off when other people don't seem even to possess that ability. Of course, this is a topic that is extremely subjective and some of what angered me could have been misinterpretation on my part. I'm not ruling that out. And yes, often I suffer from the idea that my way is the best way, which doesn't help at all.



8. Which kind of segues into this next truth about myself: I like to help people and to make them feel better. However, I now know I am a person who – if given a choice - won't do this for long if my efforts are not acknowledged. I don't like being taken for granted.



9. Lastly, I learned that a child who is learning to establish her independence and boundaries and to assert her personality does not mix very well with an aunt with PMS symptoms. Often my little niece pushed me to near insanity. And realizing that fact made me feel very guilty about the time in my teens when I yelled at my mom, accusing her of not being a good mom or whatever my imagined issue was that day. My dad died young, leaving my mom with three kids to raise on her own (ages 8, 7, and less than a year old). She did a damn good job...I must have really hurt her that day in my teens. Sorry, Mom.

Also, every time my niece and I watched Play With Me Sesame and Grover sang "wubba wubba wubba" I immediately thought of wubba, which made me smile. Wubba rocks!

And I don't remember who I ganked the phrase "Pimpercrombie and Bitch" from, but damn I like it. Props to the funny person whose name I can't recall.

Comments

Awwww.

[wubba.livejournal.com]

Also, every time my niece and I watched Play With Me Sesame and Grover sang "wubba wubba wubba" I immediately thought of wubba, which made me smile. Wubba rocks!

Thanks babe!

*sniff* I'm all weepy now.

Missed you lots and lots. Glad you are back!

Re: Awwww.

[disbelief11.livejournal.com]

Oh Wubba, I missed you bunches. Especially with Grover reminding me of you nearly every day. It's so nice to be back.

*hugs*

[fleegull.livejournal.com]

“When we want to go out for the night, we put the dog in his crate and go. You can't do that with a kid.”


Unfortunately, there are plenty of people who do just that. Or worse.

[disbelief11.livejournal.com]

I know, Fleeg, and Mr. Dis and I just don't understand them. If we had children, we'd either stay home or find a competent, reliable babysitter.

People who hurt kids or animals are evil.

[anathema666.livejournal.com]

Disbelief! Welcome back! Glad you're back in one piece, and that you didn't assault any of the people under your care. :)


I don't like being taken for granted.

*We* don't take you for granted! We *missed* you.


leaving my mom with three kids to raise on her own (ages 8, 7, and less than a year old). She did a damn good job...I must have really hurt her that day in my teens. Sorry, Mom.

Someone I really respect once told me that you are not truly an adult until you understand your parent's perspective and stop blaming them for perceived atrocities against you as a child.

I've got the "parent's perspective" thing down, and am currently working on the "stop blaming" thing.

This might take a while.

[disbelief11.livejournal.com]

I missed you all so much! It was torture, pure torture, let me tell ya.

As for that "parent's perspective" thing, I'm not sure I'll ever understand my mom completely. For that matter, do I have to? Perhaps not.